Writings

It Hurts To Be Rejected

It never entered my mind that I didn’t love myself…. I heard the Lord tell me I was beautiful, I know I’m totally accepted in the Beloved, I have forgiven myself of all my sins and yet, the first words I heard this morning from the Lord were: “I want you to love yourself, Michele.”

I didn’t hear the thunder…. I didn’t see the lightning, but it was there announcing: “Ta da! THIS is the root of your problems!” and I suspect everyone else’s. “Love your neighbor as yourself,” the Bible tells us. Is it possible that the reason we don’t love ALL our neighbors is that we don’t fully love ourselves?

Maybe 30-40 years or so ago, I had a dream that had the message in it that “Rejection” would be the last enemy that would be defeated before the manifestation of the healing would come that I’ve been believing for 50 years. Rheumatoid Arthritis is an autoimmune disease in which the body attacks itself and this demon, undergirded by the spirit of “self-rejection,” has not let up its war against me since 1964 when it entered my body. YES, yes, yes, I have known and believed fervently that I was healed by His stripes, else I wouldn’t have stopped taking medication four different times…. My ex-husband had gotten a magistrate’s order to put me in the hospital because I was in such bad shape without the meds and wouldn’t take them. Yes, I believed, but the ROOT problem had to be exposed and addressed before the manifestation of healing could come. Having been hit by Covid spurred me on to seek deeper and TODAY, I know what it is. Hallelujah!

We were set up, my brethren…. Andromeda in chains is our story, but she (the church in chains) is set free in the end. 

My personal story of rejection began with my father abandoning me when I was 4 ½ years old. I have read that children believe that something is wrong with them in such situations, but whether that was so for me or not, I haven’t been shown, but I realize feelings of rejection were in me early on in life. When children are unloved by either or both their parents, the outcome is disastrous and I believe especially when it’s the father because he carries the blessing. You men in the body of Christ, you can make up for it some by letting the Lord speak the blessing through you to His children. How much this is needed! I started to write down all the experiences of rejection I’ve had in this post, but we’ve all had them with some having had more than others. My telling you about those of mine is not what’s important, but if you want to read a light history of my early ones, I wrote about them in “The Blessing”: https://ridetheheavens.com/2020/10/13/the-blessing/

But it is NOW that I hear the voice of the Lord beckoning me to come to terms with rejection that’s been covered over by a false bravery. “False bravery” are the words that just came and how it operates, I’m not certain, but God is going to bring revelation and deliverance, not just for me but for you who have been suffering from rejection’s curse, as well. I know not how, but somehow, some way, there will no longer be a place in the subconscious mind for self-rejection to dwell.

A couple of nights ago I dreamed of something recovered. I don’t remember what it was, but I can’t think of anything more wonderful than “recovery”…. My innocence was stolen from me as a little girl when I was molested, and what is amazing is that the Lord appointed “daisies” on my path of being restored. When I was a bride I chose daisies for my bridal bouquet’s flowers as well as real ones for my headdress, and today, I am living on a road called “Daisy Lane.” The meaning of the name “Daisy” is “innocence” and truly, when innocence is recovered, we will do no harm and be able to fulfill the great commandment to love others as ourselves,…. And when we love ourselves, it will be impossible not to love others!

So tell me: “Do you love yourself?” If not, you’re going to, so come with me now on a path to recovery strewn with beautiful daisies…. and roses, too!

Categories: Writings

4 replies »

  1. Thanks for your truthful and transparent account of rejection. Very courageous and gutsy!
    Most of us can relate. Very helpful!
    Thank you Michele. ♥️

    Liked by 1 person

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