I woke up some time ago hearing the words “semblance of another.” They came in reference to a man I had come to love who the Lord inspired me to call “Carita” (“dear one”.) Another word given to me by God during my courtship with “Carita” was “Camelot” (an idealistic fantasy.) Oh how the Spirit of the Living One speaks to us in our darkness… The light may be dim as in these words not understood by me at the time they were given, but the light is always there leading us and shining on the path of truth.
I have given much thought as to how the Lord manifests His love through people…. through all the many loves we have- mother, father, sisters, brothers, friends, teachers and even strangers who say a kind word to us. I, like so many women, have desired the fervent love of a man more than anything else.
When I fell in love with “Carita”, one I believed was my God-sent husband-to-be, he told me that he would always love me…. that I could depend upon his love being a steadfast one. At the time he spoke these words, I remembered the Lord saying that He could not commit himself to man, because he knew what was in him.
Oh how we cling to the dream. We all have great longing to find and be with that special one… that prince charming or that perfect woman who will love us forever. I am not saying that God doesn’t put people together in marriage. He does, but the commitment and trust must be in God, not in the words and heart of another. How many of us know that our own hearts are wicked and deceitful? Indeed, who can know them? I do not speak bitterly… I speak as one who has come to know that I can’t trust my own heart or anyone else’s… Instead, I can trust that God turns people’s hearts whithersoever He will and that “ALL things work for the good for those who love God and the called according to His purpose”… This includes both “Carita” and me and yes, much good came out of our relationship.
It was toward the end of our courtship that a slip of paper that was hidden in one of my journals came to my attention after it fell onto the floor. A little bit prior to my reading the dream recorded on it, the words “THE END” had come booming in my mind. This is the dream written on October 1, 2007:
I was talking to a (future?) mate and something was said about Mormons. In the next scene I rolled down the window on the passenger side of the car and a man looking at me directly told me: “I am your husband because I married you.” In the end, my husband spoke these words: “Michele, this narrow end is the END of the dream.”
Because I believed that the Mormons in the dream represented the timing of the appearance of the latter day saints,” I thought that my true mate would come at the end of the church age. After my romance began with “Carita” I concluded that he was the future mate the dream referred to… not so! The words: “I am your husband” were the words spoken but by my God, not by a natural man. My true mate was not made known to me in 2007, but now it has been finally revealed to me that all other loves are but semblances of our Bridegroom, the Lord Jesus Christ. He is the true mate manifesting Himself and His love through every person who loves us.
It’s a narrow road we walk on my brothers and sisters. Our Lord told us that we can not be His disciples unless we forsake ALL-.. mothers, fathers, brethren, lands and everything we would naturally cling to for His sake. ALL our dreams will have to be laid at the foot of the cross if we want to fulfill our high calling.
At the time I met “Carita” I was not looking for a man to be a mate. I told “Carita” that I was dead to that desire and that I had offered myself to God as a living sacrifice. “Carita” responded by saying: “God does not want a dead sacrifice Michele, He wants a living one!” I was to learn that I and my dream weren’t as dead as I had supposed… that I was in a coma (symbolically) waiting to be stirred to life by “Carita.”
Ah, I had so much to learn from being with this spirit-filed one that I came to love- … this natural man who was not intended for me as my own. Yes, God has a living sacrifice now and I have been able to offer it because I know and love the One Who lives inside me and in all the ones who love me. The Lord Jesus is my husband and true love and I shall have no other Gods before Him. I realize now that my relationship with “Carita” was/is a type and shadow of HIS (our Beloved’s) love… a semblance of another.
On October 10th the English words “Kalita Day” came in my tongues and it means “KNOWN” and “understood” in Sanskrit and the origin of it is “made” or “formed.” When I read that its meaning is “known”, two scriptures came to mind: “Adam KNEW Eve” and the words that the Lord said to the five virgins who were without oil: “Depart from me! I never KNEW you!”
Tell me: “What could be better then to be understood?… to be truly known and loved by another?” Is it not misunderstanding… not really knowing one another and the motives of our hearts that divide the body of Christ? Is it not misunderstanding and having the wrong concepts of God that keep us at a distance from Him and from each other?”
Where is true intimacy today? The world has had us to wear physical masks, but many of us have been wearing masks long before this… Our masks have been our gifts… the very ones the five virgins had and all that we think that makes us look good-… our degrees, our money, our possessions, our jobs, our great accomplishments, the honor we receive from one another and more. God help us to see our need and nakedness.
I shall now share with you a marvelous way of how we can be covered and yet be naked and unashamed at the same time. . Long ago I had a friend who desired to speak in tongues and had had hands laid on her many times and was unable to receive what she had asked for. Finally, on a day when a few of us were gathered in my home, hands were laid on her and she received just one word. That word was “Ishi” and she said “Ishi, Ishi, Ishi!” every chance she could get believing it was the answer to her prayer. About a week later I discovered the scripture Hosea 2: 6: “You shall call me “Ishi” and shall call me no more “Bali.”
Do you know what “Ishi” means?-It’s HUSBAND!!! Are you intimate with your husband? Do you make love to Him when you worship in tongues? Do you know the width, breath, height and depth of Him? If you don’t, you can. When you are intimate with God, speaking His love language to and with Him, you will be naked, but unashamed because His glory will cover you. Come! Let us all worship Him in spirit and in truth. Let us KN0W our husband!
“I am your husband” saith God!!” For your MAKER is your husband, the Lord of hosts is his name and your Redeemer the Holy One of Israel; the God of the whole earth shall he be called.” Isaiah 54: 5
Oh I tell you: “Kalita Day” is here! God is about ready to make KNOWN the ones who serve Him and those who don’t! Hallelujah!