Expectation wore a mask on her face from the day she turned three years old- the day her father went away. The mask, a gift from him, was called Joyless. There was no mistaking that it was a gift because it was wrapped in shiny silver paper with a bright blue bow, but all the members of Expectation’s family looked upon the present as a sadistic joke.
From the day she put on the mask, everyone forgot that her name was Expectation, so Joyless, as she was hence known, spent her days doing whatever came her way without joy and without expecting a good end. Her friend Doubting went with her everywhere she went, along with her other so-called friend Reproach. They argued a lot whenever Joyless took off the mask to wipe the sweat off her face. Her face shined with so much light that it blinded and confused Doubting and Reproach and made them mad to see so much glory.
Reproach would be the one to shout “Cover yourself up, Joyless. You know that your mask is meant to be worn all the time. We’re not supposed to look at your face.” So Joyless concluded that the reason why her friends couldn’t bear to look at her was that she was ugly, so quickly she would obey Reproach’s order.
There was one person in her life however, who treated her with a kindness and respect she had never known. True Self was his name. He was sent to her by her Heavenly Father and ordained to be her mate, but she didn’t know it. Doubting and Reproach hated True Self for whenever he came near them, their bodies would tremble and they would freeze up barely able to breathe, much less speak a word.
True Self recognized them as enemies, but poor Joyless had been with them so long that she was blind to their true nature. They had told her that the gift of her earthly father was always to be kept on her face- That it would be an insult to her father if she removed it. Joyless believed them except for the times that True Self would come near. When he was present, her heart pounded with excitement and with expectation and she would remember that she was once called Expectation. The fluttering in her heart would become so intense that she thought that she’d die.
“Dying- What was that I was told through my grandfather, Truth, about dying?” she’d ask herself. “Why can’t I remember?”
But before the answer would come, Doubting and Reproach, who could always read her mind, would chime in together: “You’re going to die, Joyless, and when you do, you’re going to be nothing. You won’t live again like you think. You’ll just become food for the worms.” Lovely friends were they, always true to their nature.
But something in Expectation’s heart didn’t believe them. She couldn’t remember Spirit’s word because of Reproach and Doubting’s constant badgering, but the Spirit of Truth was within her, and her spirit knew even if her mind didn’t. “I am going to live again,” she’d tell herself.
Sometimes a dream would come in which she was stumbling and when she fell she couldn’t get up. It was then True Self would come and sit on the ground with her. He had a key in his hand that he told her would unlock the secrets in her heart. Before she could use it though she would be required to kiss True Self. He told her the kiss would make all the difference.” The dream would end and Joyless would hear Doubting and Reproach’s words screaming in her ear: “When you kiss True Self, you will turn into a frog. Don’t you know that True Self doesn’t want you to be who you really are. He wants to change you and make you his slave. The key is not going to reveal secrets- It’s a key that will make you aware of your uncleanness.”
Joyless was afraid. She knew that indeed uncleanness was within her. If she turned the key, would more uncleanness be shown to her?? “No, no!” She could not take the step of faith required of her.
True Self knew that Reproach and Doubting had accomplished their purpose. But he also knew the Host of Heaven was at his side and that he had the power to overcome Doubting and Reproach. So, with the help of the Dove, he set about to accomplish his plan.
On a day that Joyless was sleeping, he sent Dove to speak to her in her dream. Dove told her “You are not who you think you are. Yes, you must recognize the unclean spirits that are in the outer chamber of your body, but you have mistaken them as being in your heart. Your heart is not unclean as you suppose. Remember now,” and as he spoke the word to remember, Joyless indeed did remember. She saw herself as a golden cell within a body radiating light that was so strong, it came forth as a jewel. She was connected to other radiating stones within this glorious body. Do you see who you really are now? Dove asked. Why yes, Expectation exclaimed. When you kiss True Self, instead of being afraid of him, your eyes will be opened and will be changed. You will be HIM- it is a mystery for haven’t you heard “The Two shall be one? And just as your grandfather Truth told you, “You shall never die.”
Upon arising from her sleep, True Self was there and when she flung her arms around him, the mask flew off. The kiss that she feared would be the kiss of death was the kiss of life. “Oh my beloved, oh my beloved,” she cried with tears of joy.
The mask was no more!